Saturday, June 28, 2008

Sunday, June 22, 2008

THIS IS ADVICE FROM A CHICK

The Top 10 Things
Women Want From Men



The Top 10 things women want from men in a long-term relationship right here...

This page is for men who only have TWO MINUTES to read about what your significant other wants. If you only read one page of this website, make it THIS one.

Women want men to:


Give sympathy, not solutions.
If you could change just one thing, do this: When she talks to you about a problem she’s having, JUST LISTEN TO HER. DO NOT OFFER ADVICE! She just wants you to pay attention while she vents, and then she will FEEL BETTER! Just do it.


Cuddle more.
It’s no good if the only time you are affectionate is when you want sex. We need to hold hands, hug, kiss, etc. on a regular basis or we feel neglected.


Be romantic.
If you treat your wife or girlfriend like one of your buddies, she isn’t going to be very happy. She needs regular small gestures of love to remind her how lucky she is to be with you.


‘Make love,’ not just ‘have sex.’
A woman needs to have an emotional connection with you in order to have great sex. If it’s just wham bam and all you care about is getting off, she isn’t going to be very happy. For more advice about sex click here.


Be neater.
Wives and girlfriends HATE, I repeat, HATE having to pick up after a man. It’s just common courtesy to do things like put your dirty clothes in a hamper instead of leaving them on the floor for her to trip over, or wash some dishes, or put things away.



Be good with foreplay.
If you consider 5 minutes enough time for a good roll in the hay, you can be sure she is unsatisfied. Unless she’s one of those (few) lucky women who can have a vaginal orgasm, she needs more time, and she needs you to be emotionally engaged with her.


Be emotionally open.
A man who rarely or never shares his feelings is going to frustrate the woman he’s with. Not only is it healthier for you to open up and express a little emotion, sharing your feelings with her will make her feel closer to you, which will make her happy.


Be able to have a conversation.
If we can’t have a good conversation with you about things besides finances, kids, jobs, household concerns, etc. life is going to feel boring. Be willing to discuss things like movies, books, memories from childhood, your dreams, etc.


Have passion.
A man needs to feel passion for something in his life (besides the woman he loves!) or he will be dull, dull, dull. It could be his career, a hobby, or a volunteer pursuit, but life together is so much better if you are living up to your potential and making yourself happy by doing something you love.


Be equal partners.
It’s not enough to bring home a paycheck. Women need your emotional support, and they need you to be a co-parent, helping out every step of the way from changing diapers and midnight feeding (if you have kids) to equally dividing household chores. Say good-bye to your ideas of ‘womens’ work and be willing to help with everything.

When women get what they need and want from men, men win too because a happy woman means a happier home and quite possibly a better sex life!

Friday, June 20, 2008

Sunday, June 8, 2008

YOU THINK YOU KNOW WHAT THE OLD LADY IS THINKING?

I WAS WALKING THROUH THE GROCERY STORE THE OTHER DAY. IT WAS A SUNDAY. YOU SEE, IT WAS AN EARLY SUNDAY MORNING. I HAD THE "DREADED LIST". IT WAS THE LIST THAT EVERY MAN HATES. IT WAS ONE OF THOSE LISTS THAT YOU HAVE TO PICK UP CERTAIN NAME BRANDS AT THE GROCERY STORE, FOR INSTANCE "THE MINUTE MADE ORANGE JUICE WITH EXTRA C AND CALCIUM, WITH VITATMIN A AND 1 PART E. IT WAS THE LIST THAT YOU BUY ONE, GET ONE FREE. YOU HAVE TO SWIPE THE CARD THOUGH. DON'T FORGET TO SWIPE THE "CARD".

ALL US MEN HATE THIS LIST, CAUSE YOU HAVE TO SWIPE YOUR CARD OR YOU DON'T GET THE DISCOUNT. YOU PAY FULL PRICE THEN. AND THEN YOUR IN TROUBLE WITH THE OLD LADY, CAUSE YOU DIDN'T GET THE DISCOUNTS. THEN YOU'RE A DUMB-F---, CAUSE YOU F---ED UP AND YOU DIDN'T GET THE DISCOUNTS.

SO I'M SCRUFFY, IT'S SUNDAY MORNING. I DIDN'T SHAVE AND I'M STILL WEARING THE SWEATS AND T-SHIRT THAT I WORE TO BED THE NIGHT BEFORE. I HAVE THE CARD THOUGH, CLUTCHED I MY FIST...

OKAY, YOU KNOW HOW YOU WALK DOWN THE AISLES OF A GROCERY STORE SOMETIMES. YOU KNOW HOW YOU KEEP SEEING THE SAME PERSON, BECAUSE HE OR SHE IS WALKING IN THE SAME DIRECTION, BUT OPPOSITE ROWS IN EVERY AISLE. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, BECAUSE WE HAVE ALL BUMPED IN TO THIS PERSON MANY TIMES. YOU MAKE EYE CONTACT, BUT YOU DON'T ACKNOWLEDGE EACH OTHER. YOU KEEP WALKING BY EACH OTHER,EVERY AISLE...

SO IT HAPPENED SUNDAY. THIS VERY VERY PROPER OLD LADY WAS DOING THE "AISLE DANCE" WITH ME. SHE WAS DRESSED VERY CONSERVATIVE AND NICE. AS STATED, I WAS DRESSED AS A SCRUFF, BUT REMEMBER A PAYING CUSTOMER.

SO THERE I AM WITH MY "DREADED LIST". I HATE THAT "LIST". THEN THIS CONSERVATIVE OLD LADY KEEPS GIVING ME THE "YOU ARE A SCUM BAG LOOK". SHE IS JUST OUT OF CHURCH AND FEELING RATHER "SELF RIGHTIOUS". SO I SMILE AT HER, FIGURING THIS IS A WARM AND FRIENDLY ACT. IT WILL LIGHTEN UP HER ATTITUDE ABOUT ME.

BUT NO, SHE KEEPS ROLLING HER EYES AT ME. I EVEN HEAR A "NITH" OUT OF HER. THIS GOES ON AND ON EVERY AISLE. SO I'M STARTIN TO GET PISSED. SO FINALLY I DO IT. I PASS HER IN THE 12TH AISLE, AND WHISPER IN HER EAR, VERY SOFTLY, "NICE ASS".

SHE GIVES ME A LOOK LIKE SHE JUST SWALLOWED A FROG, AND RUNS OFF.

SO WE PASS IN THE NEXT AISLE, AND SHE'S GOT THIS BIG-ASS INVITING SMILE ON HER FACE, LIKE "WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE".

I GIVE UP ON WOMEN...